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Sunday, September 16, 2007
[160907]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH!! [160907]. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHIJIE NAI NAI[130907]!!!
[160907]
the exams are here. and their here to stay. i despise exams. is it just me or is it people's moods gets brought down doing the exam period? every single thing seems so emotionally triggered. 动不动就伤心.我真不知道该怎么做才好。
will everything be the same?
i wished everything was the same. i seem trapped in a game.
a game that has no rules. neither a hint nor a clue.
a game controlled by feelings. and tarot card readings.
a game i have to master. and it better be faster.
the players are many. im only one out of fifty.
or maybe more i dont know. but what i know cant be told.
i am the mastermind to control this game.
this game gives me strength but not forgetting stress.
it makes me emotional and nothing promotional.
my friends and family are the pawns in the game.
each carrying an important role.
but there's one and only one. that makes me feel alone.
sometimes i miss it sometimes i dont.
we met by fate. and were brought closer together.
loved the times we shared joy and pain.
'when i was at my lowest, you walked into my life', she said.
i was grateful i did the right choice. for she was my voice.
we stay so near yet seem a distance. was it me or was there no chance.
she seldom confide in me. but thats fine with me.
all i wanted to say was,'you can count on me.'
i'm not there just to play but i'm here to stay.
i never had felt this way.
she always said that things are different and never the same.
but changing is part of each and every game.
be it today or tomorrow. nothing is always the same.
so should i stop the timer in this very game.
or let her go? will everything be the same.
its ironic. it really is.
when i needed her. she was too busy for me.
when she needed me. i was also too busy for her.
in the past. it never was like that.
when i want to comfort her. she closed her door on me.
she always said,'nothing can help me'
that's what i do too. i closed my door on her.
is this what we really want?
why is it that i never had the courage to prove that im really her true friend?
others see me as her buddy. one who brings her joy and laughter.
what i yearn to be. is to be a friend whom she can rely on.
i may be wrong in saying this. but i find myself superficial in her life.
sometimes i get lost in her world. and think. am even needed here.
but she's something i treasure.
both in life and game.
this doesn't make sense but they all mean the same.
posted at : 11:01 PM
GEE GEE GEE GEE~ baby baby baby!
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